Dry January

As I did last year, I'm going to try to give up something, or add something, each month in 2026.  As I've written before, it makes the year more interesting to me.  Also, I like to test my resolve in a different way each month.  

For the second year in a row, I had a dry January.  No alcohol.  As much as I enjoy having a bourbon or an occasional glass of wine, I find it reassuring that giving up alcohol for a month is easy.  Part of it is mind over matter, just convincing myself that having a drink is just not something I do, at least not for the month of January.  The other part of it is that I really like the way I feel when I'm not drinking alcohol.  

I say both of those things as someone who probably has not been intoxicated in over a year.  At best, I'm a one, occasionally two drink guy.  Still, the recent science has moved away from the idea that a glass of red wine is good for your heart or that drinking alcohol, in moderation, does not adversely affect one's health.  Rather, everything I read now seems to indicate that drinking any alcohol is bad for you.  At 59 years of age, that might be true.  

I do know that I eat better, more healthy, if I'm not drinking alcohol.  For me, anyway, it's much easier to make a poor food choice if I've had a bourbon or two.  Chips, pretzels, etc.  That's the way it works for me, anyway.  

The other side of the coin, though, is that after a nice win in Court yesterday and a long afternoon working with a client to try to settle a case, it was very nice to have a bourbon with two of our attorneys before I left the office.  It's nice to slow down and sit, just for a few minutes, at the end of a busy day and talk to people I work with every day.  To laugh.  Joke.  To simply hang out a bit before making the 30 minute drive home.  For sure, it's a bit of a stress reliever, particularly when a bourbon also involved good company.

Nonetheless, I think I'm going to listen to the science and cut back one alcohol in 2026.  Why not?

In February, no sweets, chips, or crackers.  Also, I'm keeping a gratitude journal and once a day, I'm writing a sentence about something for which I am thankful.  I think it will center me to get into the mindset of thinking about what I am thankful for.  I hope so, anyway.  

Powerless

The Great Freeze continues as almost 100,000 are still without power one week after the ice storm.  It's crazy but according to Nashville Electric Service, our zip code will not have power restored until February 5, 2026.  That will be almost two weeks with no power for our neighborhood.

On the way home from work on Thursday, I drove through my old neighborhood, between 10th Avenue and 8th Avenue.  It was eerie, as there were blocks and blocks of houses in complete darkness.  No lights.  No streetlights.  No human activity.  Very few cars.  It looked like everyone had vanished.  Truly, the mass desertion of entire blocks made it look like a pandemic had wiped everyone out or that there had been a zombie apocalypse.  Really, really strange.

Our street is still largely without power.  Somehow, though, and I hesitate to say it too loudly, we have managed to keep our power on throughout the entire ordeal.  Last night, Jude saw one house on the other side of Linden Avenue, a few houses down from us, with power on.  Other than that, no one.  

Ms. Rachel was at Vanderbilt hospital for a few days.  Her grandson stopped by to pick up some of her things earlier this week and told us she had been moved to a rehabilitation facility.  

On our other side, Maureen has had a terrible go of it.  No power for a week.  She stayed at the Thompson Hotel in the Gulch for a few nights, then was able to get a spot at the Gilmore, a new boutique hotel in 12South, walking distance from our houses.  Thursday night, her daughter's car alarm started going off at 4:30 a.m.  every five minutes.  Unfortunately, when she got back into her house for the first time on Friday morning to check on Erin's car in the driveway in the back yard, she discovered a water pipe had burst and caused massive flooding.  I can't even imagine.  I am so sad for her.

Maureen has had a remediation truck at the house all weekend long trying to remove the moisture and, I suppose, limit a potential mold problem.  Again, I can't even imagine.

Jude and I have been scrambling, trying to find someone to cut down our trees that have fallen into Ms. Rachel's back yard and on her telephone line.  We also need someone with a bucket truck to cut down the dangling leaves at the top of the large elm in the middle of our backyard.  We have a large branch of the elm tree that fell on the roof of our in-progress screened in porch that needs to be removed.  Who knows when anyone will be able to get to those projects.  

All of the arborists have been in triage mode, trying to take care of the most dangerous and serious tree removed projects first, or so it seems.  Maybe they're simply making themselves available to the highest bidder.  For sure, there is some price gouging going on.  I also suspect there are some fly-by-night, "non-arborist" arborists springing up all over town.

This ice storm seems to have been so much more damaging than the one that hit Nashville and surrounding area in 1994.  Maybe it's recency bias, but it feels like there are a to more sustained power outages with this storm.  

Freddie O'Connell, a bit of a bumbling, absent minded professor on his best day - the accidental Mayor, if you will - has come across as unprepared, non-responsive, and ineffectual.  Fair or not, the city doesn't appear to have been prepare for the ice storm, although I am not altogether sure how you prepare for a disaster of this magnitude.  What is more unforgivable, though, is how poorly he has communicated with the people of Nashville in the aftermath of the storm.  It's like he's been in hiding, other than one or two press conferences and the occasional Instagram video as he walks through his neighborhood at night.  O'Connell will be a one-term mayor for certain.

Nashville Electric Service has looked even worse, if that is possible.  Still, what do they care?  N.E.S. in the only game in town.  It's not like a Nashville residence can decide to switch to Middle Tennessee Electric.  It just doesn't work that way.

Jude, the boys, and I are fortunate, so very fortunate.  Everyone is safe.  We have power.  We have some cleanup to accomplish, with help from professionals, but that will be taken care of over time.  So many other neighbors and Nashvillians are hurting.  It's hard to see.  

The Last of Us

Zombie apocalypse is probably too strong a phrase for what Nashville has experienced the last three days but it's not far off.  

As I sit here in The Well on Music Row - my first time to sit down in a coffee shop and take a breath since Saturday (3 + days ago) - Nashville is crawling out from under the worst ice storm since 1994.  Well over 200,000 people were without power starting Sunday morning.  Many, including our next door neighbors on both sides, are still without power.  Almost 200 poles snapped.  Trees and branches are down, literally everywhere.  Many roads are completely blocked, including Portland Avenue at 21st Avenue.  

It's like a tornado hit the entire city at the same time.  I have never seen anything like this.  Never.  So many trees lost.  Entire neighborhoods are to look entirely different when this is over.  The damage and the cleanup costs will be well over 1 billion dollars, I am sure.  So many people, including those in our neighborhood remain without power.  Everywhere, many old growth trees split right down the middle under the weight of the ice Sunday morning.  It looks like a bolt of lightning struck the crown of so many trees, cleaving them in half.    

From next door, Maureen and her dog, Clio, are in a hotel nearby with what seems like all of 12South.  Ms. Rachel, on our other side, is at Vanderbilt Hospital.  When she lost power, she switched to her portable oxygen tank.  At 89, she doesn't have family nearby.  As her oxygen supply dwindled late Sunday afternoon, Jude called an ambulance at her request.  We ran an extension cord from one of our outside outlets in front of our house into Ms. Rachel's house, so she could plug in her oxygen tank.  Like MacGyver, it worked!  

When it became clear the ambulance wasn't going to be able to get to her anytime soon, JP and I helped her walk up her sidewalk and over to our house.  We had cleared her sidewalk and ours, too, but not the sidewalk in front of houses.  It was slow going, as she held onto her walker, JP and I on each side of her with Jude close behind her in case she fell.  We made it and settled Ms. Rachel into the reading chair in our living room, covered in blankets because she was so cold.  

Jude warmed up some pasta I had made the previous evening, so Ms. Rachel was able to eat a hot meal.  We talked for a while, then she called her grandson and her sister to check in, before falling asleep in the chair.  The fire department arrived at our house to check on her just past midnight.  About 1 a.m., the ambulance arrived, and Ms. Rachel went to Vanderbilt Hospital.  

The temperatures have been in the single digits at night and not much higher during the day, as a result of which the trees are still covered in ice.  A lot of the ice on the streets - particularly the main streets - melted or was salted and plowed by Monday afternoon.  The neighborhood streets are still dicey in places.  JP and Joe have been out of school all week and not in remote school - much to their delight - because so many are without power and internet access.  

Because our internet has been out, the last two nights we watched old movies on DVD's!  JP was able to figure out how to operate the DVD player, which is more than Jude or I could have done.  Two nights ago, we watched Anchorman:  The Legend of Ron Burgundy.  Quite funny, as the boys love Will Ferrell.  Last night, we watched Point Break, the ultimate "good bad movie."  Awesome.  

There is more to tell and photos to be posted but I've got to get back home and get to work.  Hopefully, the tree company will arrive this morning to take a look at the trees in our back yard.  The one that fell into Ms. Rachel's yard has to come down.  There are large branches broken off and caught in the crown of the biggest tree in our backyard, one that hovers over our house.  There also is a large branch on the roof of our new screened in porch.  It's a mess.

Still, we're safe.  We have power, for now.  Jude's parents have power.  Blessings everywhere.    

Portland Brew Blues

A year and a half, maybe two years ago, I sat in Portland Brew late on a Saturday afternoon and enjoyed a coffee.  The shop was empty for the most part because it was near closing time.  I smiled as I listened to the baristas talk about their plans for the night.

Outside, 12South was bustling.  New 12South, that is, not the neighborhood we moved adjacent to 20 years ago.  As I sat there lost in my thoughts, I thought about how few "neighborhood" places there were anymore.  Mafiozza's had recently closed.  All that was left, really, was Burger Up, Frothy Monkey and, of course, Portland Brew.  Everything else was a high end chain restaurant (The Henry) or an expensive women's clothing boutique. 

The neighborhood I fell in love with was almost completely gone.  In the place of neighbors and regulars were tourists and bridesmaids, all staying at one of the many cursed AirBnB's that had sprung up to the east and west of 12th Avenue.  12South was, and is, unrecognizable in comparison to what it was like just a decade ago.

As I drank my coffee, alone, I thought about how much I appreciated the fact that Portland Brew was soldiering on, like the Little Engine That Could, in the face of all of the nearby development and construction projects.  A neighborhood coffee shop to be sure.  Good coffee.  Reasonable prices.  Sparse, yet comfortable furnishings.  A couch and a chair on top of a small raised stage at the front of the left side of the shop (a stage I never saw used).  Friendly baristas.  Families with strollers.  Lots of regulars.   

I love that word, because in many ways, it's what makes a coffee shop a coffee shop.  Regulars.  

Probably, that's what made it so special.  The regulars.  Any morning I stopped in for coffee on the way to work, I said hello or had a quiet moment with Dennis, Stuart, or one of the many other familiar faces that I didn't necessary know by name.  Of all the coffee shops I have frequented over the years, it felt the most like home.  Portland Brew was to me, in my 50's, what Bongo Java had been for me in my 40's.  

A safe haven.  A port point in the storm of a busy, sometimes stressful, wonderful life full of family, friends, attorneys, and clients.  All of it.  In many ways, Portland Brew centered me as I lived my life.  There, coffee in hand, I wrote in this blog, I read, I worked.  I also mediated and I breathed.  I relaxed and unwound.

As I've written before, Portland Brew was the only coffee shop that stayed open through the uncertainty that surrounded the early, horrible days of the pandemic.  Take out only at first but still, I was able to maintain a sense of normalcy by getting a cup of coffee from Portland Brew in the mornings and sipping it as I sat in a chair outside the strip of stores next to Burger Up, reading the New Yorker.  In fact, that was when I started taking my own coffee cup to get coffee, a habit I've continued at the other coffee shops I go to, although the crazy days of the pandemic are nothing more than distant memories now.  

Staying open during the pandemic was the most neighborly thing imaginable for a neighborhood coffee shop to do.  I'll never forget that.

Many, many weekend afternoons, I finished a neighborhood run with a cup of coffee at Portland Brew, then walked home.

Predictably, within a month or two of my late Saturday afternoon of reverie at Portland Brew, one of the baristas told me they were closing in August.  The owner had agreed to lease the building to, wait for it, Luke Bryan and Jockey, so they could open up what we call "the underwear store."  And, just like that, Portland Brew was gone.  All that was left were memories.  

The regulars scattered, too, of course.  Initially, some of them gathered in the mornings at Lady Bird Taco, or so I am told.  I saw one or two of them, occasionally, at Dose or Bongo Java, even 8th & Roast (my new morning hang).  Even now, 18 months later, it's hard for me to drive or run by where Portland Brew was without getting a bit nostalgic.   

I am thinking about Portland Brew this morning, as I sit in Haraz, sipping an excellent latte, because severe winter weather (allegedly) is on the way mid-morning.  The forecast from earlier in the week for well 12" - 18" of snow has been revised.  It looks like Nashville may get some ice and a few inches of snow but even that is not a certainty, much to the boys' disappointment.  

Every time it snowed or when winter weather was coming, Portland Brew opened up.  Maybe a little late, but it always opened up.  At some point, I learned that the owner picked up the baristas himself, so they wouldn't have to drive and took them home, as well.  In the late mornings and early afternoons on snow days, Portland Brew often was packed with families walking to and from Sevier Park, dragging their sleds, who had stopped in for coffee or hot chocolate.  

So, I guess this is the long overdue requiem for Portland Brew.  It's one I've put off writing.  

The last day Portland Brew was open was a Saturday.  In the end, the entire day was a party.  A sendoff for an old friend.

In what is probably the most Portland Brew thing I could imagine, people jotted down their memories on sticky notes and stuck them on the wall.  Beautiful.

Life360 Knows All

In so many ways - really, in every way - it's harder to be a teenager today than it was when I grew up.  It seems like it's virtually impossible for a teenager, today, to have any sense of privacy or to go off the grid, even for a few minutes.

How can you figure out who you are if someone is always watching?

If I want to, I can look at JP and Joe's classroom performance and grades on a daily basis simply by accessing MBA's portal through my cell phone.  Maybe I'm not the most attentive parent but if the boys are doing well academically - and they are - I don't feel like they need me looking over their shoulder every day to see if their homework was turned in or what grade they made on the last quiz or test.  

Mid-quarter and Quarter or Semester report cards are different, of course.  I look at those.  But I feel like the boys need, and  have earned, the freedom to budget their time and manage their academics on their own, unless and until their performance indicates otherwise.  Is that laissez faire parenting?  Perhaps.  To me, though, I think it's giving the boys a sense of responsibility and independence, which is something they need now and will need more later.  

It's a fine line as a parent, I think, between over-parenting or helicoptering or giving a child too much rope.  I think the line is in a different place with every child, even and especially siblings.  I also think the line moves from time to time for a child, depending on the decisions he or she makes and the judgment, good or bad, he or she shows in making those decisions.

Early yesterday evening, at the end of a long two day mediation, I called Jude on my way home.  With "Snowpocalypse 2026" set to hit Nashville tonight and tomorrow, she had been to the grocery store to stock up earlier in the day.  Nonetheless, she told me that JP had just left to go to the grocery store to pick up a few things.

That's weird, I thought.  JP never goes to the grocery store, especially on a school night, when free time is at a premium.  Clearly, going to the grocery store was pretext for getting out of the house.  No question about it.  

How did I know that?  Because I was 17 years old a long, long time ago.  Every thought or feeling JP has I have had, as well, albeit 40 + years ago.  Plus, I know my son.   And I would have done the same thing.  In fact, I did the same thing, many times, in 1982 or 1983.

The difference is that I could take a slight detour to see a friend, maybe even a girl, while I was running an errand and nobody would be the wiser.  Why?  Because my mom didn't have Life360.  Hell, she didn't have a cell phone.  I was able to move around Brentwood without my mom knowing where I was  at every minute.  The point is that I had more freedom that JP has, or Joe will have. 

Did I do some things I shouldn't have?  Sure.  Did I make mistakes?  Of course.  But I also developed  a sense of independence and self-reliance.  Today, it's harder for teenager to develop those qualities under the ever watchful eye of Life360, Find My iPhone, etc.  

When I got home and JP still was not there, Jude and I raised our eyebrows.  I pulled out my cell phone, looked at Llife360, and immediately saw where he was.  Not at Publix.  He made another stop for less than a half hour.  Good for him.

He's 17.  He's driving.  It's time for him to test the boundaries and rules we set for him.  That's as it should be.  It's what I want him to do, within reason.  He's growing up, maturing, and he needs to space to make decisions, good and bad.  He's earned that space with how hard he works, how responsible he is, how mature he is, and the kind of person he is.  All of those things.

We talked about it when he got home.  My thought was that if the worst thing he does as a teenage living at home is to take a slight detour to go see a friend, before or after a trip to the grocery store, then Jude and I are raising a pretty damn good boy.  I told him precisely that, too.

It's the same thing my mom said to me in the late summer of 1982 when my Caroline Blue 1966 - with a friend driving it - was impounded by the Brentwood Police Department after Greg Westfall and I almost got caught rolling (w/toilet paper) a house in our neighborhood.  She was somewhat amused and unperturbed by the entire event.  I felt the same way last night and I feel the same way this morning.  

Jude and I are so lucky to have the boys we have.  I wish the ride would never end. 

Weekend at Joe's Place

Jude and JP are in Texas, taking a look at Rice University in Houston and the University of Texas in Austin, so Joe and I are spending the holiday weekend together at home.  It's rare that Jude or I get a few days alone with one of the boys, so it's always an enjoyable experience when it happens.

It's not like Joe has tons of down time, of course, because school is back in full swing and there is always studying to be done.  Still, we've managed to find some leisure time this weekend in between school work and various sport activities.

Friday night, Joe and I ordered takeout from Postino's - one of our favorites but not Jude's, for some reason - and watched the first half of Creed 3.  JP watched it on a flight a couple of years ago, so Joe and I have been trying to find a time to see it on our own.  

Saturday morning, Joe's Bucket Squad drew the short straw, so to speak, and had the early game (8 a.m.) at J.T. Moore.  Ouch.  They soundly defeated another team, the Bucket Boyz, that had three MBA seventh graders on the roster.  I kept the scorebook and, as always, enjoyed interaction with the boys on a more personal basis in the context of a basketball game.  

Before the game started, I pulled Rex Waddy aside and told him how proud I was of how hard and consistently he had played lately.  I also told him I loved the fact that he was upset after MBA lost to Ensworth last week because that meant he cared.  It's supposed to feel like that when you lose to a rival.

Joe had a 3-pointer in the first half and a couple of other buckets, one on a nifty no-look past from Carson on a fast break.  Overall, the boys played well, although I continue to wish Cole would play with his back to the basket more and use this size to establish an inside game.  I think it would expand his game tremendously if he would establish himself inside, especially against smaller players, then work outside and shoot from distance.  But, what do I know?

The highlight of the day was breakfast after the Bucket Squad game.  Joe and I drove to Mr. Aaron's Goods on Gallatin Road, deep in East Nashville, a place I had read about and tried unsuccessfully to get to over the holidays.  To our delight, Joe and I had the best breakfast sandwiches we've ever had!  Joe had a bacon, egg, and (white cheddar) cheese on a plain bagel.  I had a sausage, egg, and (white cheddar) cheese on an everything bagel.  OMG!  Literally, to die for!  We will most certainly be back.

Yesterday afternoon, Joe had a pitching workout for the Redbirds at Ezell Harding Christian School.  They have a small workout facility in an out building near the track, behind the school.  The school is near the old Hickory Hollow Mall, so it's not particularly easy to get to.  Still, a baseball workout is a baseball workout.

Joe has a decision to make about baseball, I think.  He was accepted for a Wilson Grant at MBA to take a week long trip to Washington D.C., a trip JP was lucky enough to take, too, in the summer after his seventh grade year.  So, Joe already will miss a couple baseball tournaments.  On top of that, Joe has spoken, somewhat longingly, of how much he would love to go back to Sports Camp at Woodbury Forest.   This would be his last year of eligibility, age wise, to go to camp there.  

The problem, of course, is that he really can't play travel baseball this summer and go to camp at Woodberry Forest.  We talked about it a bit over dinner and playoff football (Seahawks-49ers) at Edley's BBQ last night.  I told him it's not what he needs to do but what he wants to do.  I don't want him to think he has to play baseball this summer.  However, I did tell him that I suspected it might he harder to make the Redbirds travel team the following year if he quits this summer's team.  It's a big decision for him and I will be curious what he decides to do.

After dinner at Edley's, we turned off the Seahawks' blowout of the 49ers to watch part of the 30-for-30, "June 19, 1994," which is a 1-hour documentary about the day of the OJ Simspon car chase in the White Ford Bronco.  While listening to a Bill Simmons podcast earlier in the day, I told Joe about the car chase and how crazy it was.  He was interested and I remembered the 30-for-30, and off we went last night.

Today, it will be church at St. Patrick's, another baseball workout, and more studying.  Probably a little NFL playoffs mixed in, too.

(8th & Roast)

Hardwood Joe

I've enjoyed watching Joe play basketball for MBA's seventh grade ("C" team) team the past few weeks.  He was supposed to play this afternoon, but Valor canceled the game.  He only has four basketball games left, three of which are next week.  I'm reminded of how short the middle school sports seasons are, which I had kind of forgotten since JP is in the back end of high school.

As I predicted before the season, Joe is starting, playing point guard, and in many ways running the team for better or worse.  He knows the offense, knows where everyone is supposed to be, and competes his ass off every play.  He turns the ball over too much, though, in part because his handle is not where it needs to be and his size limits his ability to pass over defenders.  This is especially true when he's double teamed.  

Still, he plays with heart and he's scoring the basketball more than he has in the past.  In a tough 44-34 loss to Tuesday Monday night, he scored 10 points and easily could have had 15.  He hit two 3-pointers and had a couple more buckets in the paint.  He missed a gimme layup at the end of the first half, though, and had a good look at a 3-pointer, late, that looked it was going in before it rimmed out.  He made some nice defensive plays, as well, including a late steal that led to a layup by his teammate, Rex Waddy.

I've coached, and known, Rex since he was five years old or so.  His father, Alex, is an old attorney friend of mine, as is his grandfather, Jack.  Believe it or not, Jack Waddy and I used to play basketball at the Uptown YMCA, now defunct, at lunch when I clerked at Manier, Herod in the summer of 1992 and, later, when I went to work there.  Yes, that is more than 30 years ago.  Alex and I used to play law league softball together.  A decathlete in college at Virginia, he's one of the best athletes I have ever known.

Rex is a sweet, kind hearted kid whom I love to death.  He's one of my all-time favorites out of JP's and Joe's groups because he's so funny, quirky, happy, and big hearted.  I think I identify with him in part because he lost his mother, Alex's wife, to colon cancer a few years ago.  Having lost my dad at a young age, we share in common that experience, although no two situations are the same.

What I love about Rex's game this winter is that I can see the light bulb beginning to come on for him.  He's competing consistently and, clearly, how he plays and how the team performs is starting to matter to him.  In games, he's never scared.  He uses his length and athleticism to rebound, defend, and get to the cup.  Now, he misses layups - a lot - but that can and will be corrected.  As his dad, Alex, told me, Rex is starting to love the game of basketball.  That's a beautiful thing to see.

Joe, Rex, Bennett, and Sawyer, three of whom are from USN (Joe, Bennett, and Sawyer) are starters and tone setters for the team.  I love that, of course.  Joe is a natural leader and has the ability to connect with anyone and everyone.  I know it and I need him to know it.  I think he's starting to figure that out.

This weekend, Jude and JP are traveling to Texas so JP can look at University of Texas and Rice.  Wow.  It's all happening.  I'm looking forward to having a long weekend at home with Joe.

(Herban Market)