The Run of a Lifetime

Yesterday morning, early, Jude left for her daily walk on the beach.  JP and I put on our running gear and began to stretch, getting prepared for a 4-mile run on the Longleaf Pine trail near our house.  Joe - yes, Joe! - put on his running gear and waited for JP and I to finish our four miles, so he could join us for a final mile.  I told Joe what time we would be back and to wait on the front porch for us, so he could jump in and we wouldn't have to stop our run.

Initially, I thought I would drop JP off after four miles and pick Joe up for a fifth mile but JP said he wanted to run with us.  Oh, man, I thought, today is the day.  And it was.

As a longtime, avid runner and as a father, I've dreamed of the day I might go on a run with both of my sons.  In my mind, it was a bit of a long shot, because there was no guarantee JP and Joe would have any desire to run as an avocation.  I've always been careful not to force running on either one of them and I'm sure that's helped to pique their interest to a certain extent.  

My philosophy - stated in this space before on more than one occasion - has been that I wanted JP (and Joe) to come to running rather than me try to take running to him.  

When JP started running with me during the beginning of the pandemic, it became clear to me pretty quickly that he had an affinity for running and that he had real ability.  Now, what he would do with that would be another story.  What he did, of course, over the next few years was train himself into an absolute beast of a cross country runner, winning all six of his races as an 8th grader last fall.  

Joe was at all of JP's races and because he's Joe, took a great deal of pride in JP's running accomplishments.  He's nothing if not a dedicated little brother and is, in fact, JP's biggest fan.  Joe also has seen how hard JP trains to excel on the cross country course.  He's also seen his old man go out for runs, again and again, for as long as he can remember.

When Joe began playing club soccer last fall, he began running a lot more than he ever had before because there was a real emphasis on conditioning.  The boys did track work at Harding Academy's upper fields at almost every practice.  Soon enough, Joe was running one or two miles at practice fairly easily.  He began asking me when he could go for a run with me, just as JP did about the same age.  He also mentioned that he wanted to run cross country next year at USN, as a 5th grader.

This might actually happen, I thought.  

My goal, of course, is not that I can raise one, or two, successful cross country runners.  That's not the point of all of this.  Rather, my goal is for the boys to see running as I do, as a path to lifetime fitness and to taking price in their body and what it is capable of doing.  I want them to realize the benefits of hard work.  When you run more, you get better at running.  It really is that simple.  I want them to learn the value of dedication to something and to prioritizing something that is important to them.  I want them to make time to run and, by default, to take care of themselves.  I want them to feel the pride I feel, at age 56, after a 5-mile run.  

To close the circle, JP and I had a nice run on one of my favorite trails, out and back, four miles.  As we ran back into Old Florida Village, and to our rental house, Joe popped out onto the front deck, hopped down the steps, and off we went.  

JP, Joe, and I ran up the bike path on 30A toward the main intersection in Santa Rosa Beach, between Shunk's Gulley and Sunrise Coffee.  Just the three of us.  I smiled widely at walkers and a few runners as we passed them going the other direction.  

It wasn't a long run that the three of us shared.  It was only a mile.  However, out of all of the thousands of miles I have logged over a 30 + year running career - a lifetime, really - it was probably my favorite mile I have ever run.  And that's saying something.  

What it was - I hope - is the beginning of something between the three of us.  God willing and health permitting, I'm dreaming of the day when the three of us run four or five miles together.  

And maybe, just maybe, that day is closer than I think. 

  

Puttung the Brakes on at the Beach

January and February were predictably busy months for me at work.  Two cases that, for completely different reasons, didn't go to trial as scheduled.  One settled on the eve of trial and the other was continued after my opposing counsel got sick, also on the eve of trial.  Still, the preparation for trial is where the all consuming work gets done, so the first two months of the year were crazy.

Originally, I had planned to take the family to Arizona for spring vacation but, in the end, we settled on the old reliable, returning to Santa Rosa Beach yet again for a week of relaxation on familiar turf for all of us.  And I'm glad we did.

As I write this, it's Sunday morning and sitting outside Ama Vida in Seaside, FL, with a view of "the square" as visitors begin their days.  Most, like us, probably arrived yesterday.  Some, of course, are leaving today, as most of the weekly rentals run Saturday to Saturday.  Already in the 45 minutes I have been sitting here, things are starting to hum as groups of people congregate over breakfast and others return from an early morning walk or run. 

It's a beautiful beach morning, although a bit windy.  Sunny with the temperature in the low '70's at 9 a.m. There's rain coming later today, though.  Hopefully, JP and I, and maybe Joe, will squeeze in a run at some point this afternoon.

It's time for a week away, for all of us.  A week away from work for Jude and me and a week away from school for JP and Joe.  JP had Friday off, actually, and on our early morning run before I went to work, he was unusually talkative.  My guess is that he was feeling relieved to be free of the stress of studying and preparing for tests and quizzes at school - grinding as he calls it - and looking forward to a week of down time.  I get it.

I'm almost finished with Walter Mosley's first Easy Rawlins book, "The Devil in the Blue Dress" (30th anniversary edition).  I read an interview with him, recently, in the New York Times, and he had some interesting things to say about writing in general and being one of few African American writing crime fiction in the early '90's.  His books are as much of a social commentary of the times as they are hard boiled crime novels.  Plot driven thrillers that make you think or so it seems to me.

I also brought Paul Newman's memoir, which I picked up at Landmark Booksellers in Franklin on Friday morning.  

And, as I sit here in the middle of Seaside, I see that one of my favorite bookstores, Sundog Books, visible across the way, has opened up.  I'll wander over there, I suppose, and see if anything captures my fancy.

Yep, it's good to be back at the beach.

The Sporting Life

It would be fine, I know, if JP and Joe weren't sports fans.  But because I am such a sports nut, it sure is nice that they love sports as much as they do.  Most of our weekends involve Jude and chauffeuring the boys around to a practice or game.  This weekend was no different.

Friday, we had a rare off night, so to speak.  Nothing scheduled.  We watched an NBA game on television, though, and bantered back and forth about various NBA teams' playoff possibilities.

Saturday morning, Joe had a game in the WNSL "March Madness" tournament at Legacy Courts in Franklin.  Win and play on or lose and the basketball season for Joe's "Bucket Squad" team is over.  They won.  

After the game, JP and I drove to my office in Franklin, changed clothes, and went for a 5-mile run together.  I love to run with JP but this one was especially memorable, because we ran to Harlinsdale Park and Fort Granger, two of my favorite routes when I run after work in downtown Franklin.  I've run those routes hundreds of time and it was really, really special to have him by my side on the run Saturday morning.  

When we finished the run, JP and I went to Dick's Sporting Goods because he needed some sunglasses for baseball.  The infield of the MBA middle school baseball field on 42nd Street in West Nashville stares directly in to the setting sun, which is a problem since most of his games there start at 4:30 or 5:00 p.m.  Like today's, for example (MBA vs. Woodland M.S.).

Saturday afternoon, I took JP, Joe, and two of Joe's basketball buddies (Cole and Pike) to the Belmont U. baseball game vs. Kansas. The weekend series was a big deal because Kansas is from a power five conference (the Big 12).  Belmont won Friday night's game but lost the game we saw, 5-0.  It was a lovely  Saturday afternoon, though, and I loved being with the boys, outside, watching baseball.  

Saturday night, Jude made lasagna - my mom's recipe, which has become a favorite of the boys - and we watched the movie, "Creed."  The boys loved it, of course.  Next up, "Creed II," so we can be ready to see the third installment of the Creed franchise, which opened in theaters on Friday night.  

Sunday morning, Jude and the boys went to early church at Cathedral.  Then, Joe's basketball season came to an end at the hands of the Outkast, their rival.  Down early, the boys rallied in the second half and even took the lead, briefly, when Pike hit a 3-pointer.  Joe had started the run on the first possession of the second half when he hit a 3-pointer of his own.  The Outkast pulled away late and that was that.  We'll get them one of these days.  

After his basketball game, Jude rushed Joe to Antioch for his first club soccer game of the season.  In three periods of a friendly, Joe's Armada team lost to a very good 11U team from Hendersonville, 7-3.  Joe played center back in was in goal, as well.  It will be interesting to see where he ends up playing in the spring season.  He's a better goalie than his buddy, Preston, but Joe's probably more valuable anchoring the defense at center back than playing goalie.  

I missed Joe's game because JP had scheduled a pitching workout with Quint "Coach Q" Robinson.  Because everything comes full circle, I've know Q's father, Worrick, for 30 + years.  He's a practicing attorney and a longtime friend and softball teammate of mine.  Now, Q plays on my law league softball team and gives JP pitching lessons.  Full circle.

I grabbed an afternoon coffee at Honest Coffee Roasters on Charlotte Avenue and watched the end of the Lakers-Warriors game on my laptop, then returned to pick up JP after his workout.  A Lakers' win, thankfully.  Jude took Joe to and end-of-season pizza party while JP and ate dinner at home.  Afterward, the three of us watched the Knicks beat the Celtics in double overtime in a great NBA basketball game.  

Sports, sports, sports, and we wouldn't have it any other way.

20

Last week, Jude and I celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary in classic fashion.  For us, anyway.  She picked Joe up from school and JP from basketball practice after school, got a quick dinner, then took Joe to basketball practice.  I taught class at the Nashville School of Law from 6:30 - 8:10 p.m.  In other words, Jude and I were on the go, as we normally are, with family and work.  

We did manage to sneak away Friday night for a quiet dinner in our neighborhood at Epice.  By sneak away, of course, I mean I roared into the Epice parking lot from Franklin on two wheels after concluding a difficult, 3-day mediation - successfully, I might add.  There's that work thing, again.  I was on a bit of a high, though, as the mediation was challenging, to be sure, but I enjoyed getting to know the parties and mediating for two attorneys of whom I am very fond.  

Saturday night, Jude and I went to see Vail Johnson and his jazz fusion at the Nashville Jazz Workshop near Fisk University.  We took a bottle of wine and a meat/cheese plate - courtesy of Jude - into the venue, which was cool.  It was a nice night.  Something different and fun.  

So, twenty years married.  Twenty-five years together.  That's a long time, when I stop and think about it.  I think I appreciate the longevity of our relationship even more given the kind of work I do.  While I more than many have long realized that nothing lasts forever, it is nice to be in a relationship that has lasted as long as ours.  In many ways, it's becoming more and more rare to see two people together for more than two decades.  

So much has happened in our lives over the last twenty years.  A lot of it good, but some of it bad, or sad.  Jude and I have laughed together, for sure.  We've argued or fought with each other occasionally but, fortunately, not too often.  Personally, we've dealt with health issues, some more serious than others.  We've cried on each other shoulder in difficult times, especially when we've lost people we've loved.  I'm thinking, of course, of our beloved Carley and my mom, who died roughly a month apart three years ago.  

I think we've leaned on each other in the hard times, the times of loss or uncertainty and unhappiness at work.  We've tried hard to be there for each other.  To listen, which is so important in any long-term, healthy relationship.  To not talk and not offer advice but to listen.  

And, then, of course, there is the boys.  JP and Joe, our North Start and the two lights of our lives.  For them, we give everything, yesterday, today, and tomorrow.  As we ate dinner at Epice, we marveled at our great good fortune in having the boys that we have as our sons.  In our jobs - both of our jobs - we see, sometimes, terribly things and situations with children in crisis, struggling to keep their heads above water.  I think makes us appreciate how blessed we are with out boys all the more.  I know it works that way for me.  

My new lawyer at work, Andrea, shakes her head and laughs on Mondays when I tell her how busy Jude and I were over the weekend, transporting JP and Joe to one sporting event or another.  The chauffeur's hat goes on, for me, as soon as I leave the office on Friday evening.  The thing is, though, Jude and I wouldn't have it any other way.  This time with the boys is fleeting, for sure, especially since JP will be driving in a little more than a year.  

When you think about it, really, all of this is fleeting.  Time - that concept, again - passes by, seemingly slowly, and then suddenly, it's gone.  Before we're ready, we're out of time, and left only with our memories of these crazy, busy, challenging, lovely days and months and years with out boys and with the knowledge that we raised them together, Jude and I.  

For all or the professional accolades and recognition, formally and informally, for the reputations Jude and I have built among our peers and colleagues, none of it really matters.  What matters - to us, anyway - is those boys, JP and Joe, our life's work and our crowning achievement.  Everything we do is for them.  Everything we have is for them.  That's something Jude and I have in common, I know.  

So, I'll finish my coffee at Dose, after having dropped JP off early at MBA for a Fellowship of Christian Athletes meeting.  Jude will work from home today and hang out with Joe, who is off school due to parent-teacher conferences.  I think she is going to take the boys to see Belmont play baseball this afternoon.  Tomorrow, Joe has his end-of-season basketball tournament and JP has a pitching lesson at some point on Sunday evening.  

And so it goes.  From a snowy wedding night at the Parthenon, celebrating our union with so many of our family and friends, to a life filled with practices, games, and a life built around our boys.  I wouldn't change a thing, not one solitary thing.  

Twenty is a big number.  I'm looking forward to twenty more years together, God willing.

JP on the Hill

Yesterday, I was lucky enough to arrange my schedule such that I could watch JP's second middle school baseball game of the season, against, Brentwood Middle School.  I missed his first game the day before because a mediation went longer than I had hoped.

I knew JP was scheduled to start at pitcher, which was another reason I really wanted to be there.  He pitched well in the fall and I was excited to see how he looked on the mount this spring.  As a bonus, I took my longtime friend and 80 year old mentor Ed Silva, to the game.  He was to be a guest lecturer in the family law trial practice class I am co-teaching at Nashville School of Law, so I had agreed to give him a ride to and from his office in Franklin.  It worked out that I drove him to the game and he watched it with me which, honestly, was pretty special.

JP looked great pitching.  He breezed through the first three innings - no hits, no walks, and two strikeouts.  In the fourth inning, the leadoff hitter - a lefty - laid down a nifty bunt on the third baseline.  JP pounced on it and fired a throw to first that got away from him and sailed into right field, which left runners at first and third with one out.  He struck the next batter out.  With two outs, the runner on first stole second and an execution mistake on what was supposed to be a fake throw down to second base allowed a run to score.  The next batter grounded out to shortstop and the inning ended.

In the bottom of the fourth inning, JP led off with a booming double to right field, well over the right fielder's head.  Later in the inning, JP scored the first run of the game for MBA.  

He walked the leadoff hitter in the top of the fifth inning, then gave up a single to left center field on an 0-2 count, as he left a fastball too far out over the plate.  Coach Martin pulled him at that point, which I appreciated, as he was at 59 pitches or so.  There was no need to go too deep in the pitch count in the second game of the season, for sure.  BMS scratched out a run and led 2-1.

I had to leave before the last inning, when MBA rallied.  They had runners at second and third base but couldn't plate the typing run in the bottom of the seventh inning and lost, 2-1.  

It was cool - really cool, actually - to watch JP on the mound, in control the entire time.  He covered first base, twice, on ground balls to the right side.  He also made a nice play on a hard hit ground ball right up the middle.  He had good command, although he didn't throw his curve ball a lot.  He located his fast ball and felt like the other team was having a hard time catching up with it, so he kept throwing it.

It's going to be a fun season of baseball, at school and this summer with HBC.