Sometimes, it's not about the results.
Before the MBA middle school baseball season started, JP and I talked about our expectations about how the season would go. I reminded him that most likely, his team would struggle at times, given that there were 13 seventh graders and only five eighth graders. It would be different from last season, when he was the only seventh grader on the A team.
What I told him, as well, is that I wasn't really concerned about his performance on the field this season. My goal for him was to grow as a leader, recognizing that this was probably his last chance to truly lead a school sports team until he was a junior or, more likely, a senior in high school. I was looking for growth in the leadership department. I thought this was a unique opportunity for JP to develop his leadership skills and I wanted him to take advantage of it.
Sure enough, the team has struggled at times. They're slightly under .500 right now with the regular season in the books. The HVAC tournament starting tomorrow night. It's been frustrating for JP, at times, because some of the younger players don't pay attention or consistently work hard in practice. JP is a grinder. He puts the work in and he expects his teammates to do the same. He's having to learn that winning and losing - and improving individually - isn't as important to everyone as it is to him.
What I think I'm finding out - and I already suspected - is that a lot of kids these days (especially private school kids) just aren't that hungry to improve, to excel, to achieve. Somehow, it's become cool not to work hard or strive for success and individual improvement. So many kids JP and Joe go to school with have everything. Nice houses, nice cars, extravagant vacations. Why work hard when it's all given to you?
That's not the way Jude and I are raising our boys. I'm beyond thankful that JP and Joe understand the value of hard work, maybe because on some level they see Jude and me grinding every day. They also see me run, often, to try and stay in shape. They see - I hope - that it takes hard to work to gain a measure of success in life.
Last Friday night, JP played a game at Pitts Park in Antioch. It's an old school baseball park and one of my favorites. I was talking to a dad before the game who also happens to be one of JP's favorite teacher thus far at MBA. He told me how much he enjoyed having JP in class. He told me JP made his class better my participating and helping lead thoughtful discussions. Continuing, he complimented JP on being so well rounded as a scholar and an athlete. Coming from a teacher and coach that JP and I respect, those comments meant a lot to me.
Tuesday, during a home game at the MBA field on 42nd Street, a father approached Jude and asked if we were JP's parents. He introduced himself and told us his won was a seventh grader and teammate of JP's. He told us that while JP is a good baseball player, what really had impressed him was what a good leader he was for this team. Always encouraging other, younger teammates. Getting the guys ready to play before games.
Honestly, I get a bit emotional writing this, because as a father, it's exactly what I wanted to hear someone else say about my son. It's exactly what JP and I talked about before the baseball season started. JP's grown as a leader, I think, and it makes me really, really proud to see another father notice that about him.
My enduring memory of JP's eighth grade baseball season may be what I saw later that game, after the father talked to Jude and me. JP was the designated hitter and after his buddy and teammate, Gavin, worked out of a jam to end an inning, Coach Martin and JP, burst from the dugout, side by side, clapping and encouraging the boys as they trotted off the field to bat. JP looked like an assistant coach, in part because he's bigger than most of the seventh graders.
Snapshot moment to be sure and one I will remember for a long time.
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