Tired

I'm worn out, mentally and emotionally, from a mediation that didn't end until after 11:30 p.m. last night.  

Now, I'm sitting in one of my spots at the Factory - renovations under way all around me - sipping my coffee from Honest Coffee Roasters and trying to recharge my batteries before work.  Today is September's last day and we have a million things to do before she leaves.  As paralegals go, she's one of the best with whom I have worked.  Losing her is going to be tough for me and for my law practice.

Mediating a case, at least the way I do it as a mediator, is an all consuming endeavor.  I put so much of myself - all of myself, really - into the process that it can be exhausting and draining for me.  This is particularly true if the parties have strong personalities or the attorneys have healthy egos, or both.  It's also true when the facts are challenging (i.e. addiction, children at risk or in crisis, domestic violence, etc.).

I think that's part of what makes me a good mediator, though.  I'm willing to meet the parties where they are emotionally.  I'm going to do my dead level best to understand where they are and how they feel.  Through a long day of sometimes intense conversations during mediation sessions, I'm going to find a way to connect with the parties on some level so I can build a certain level of trust between us.  

It's a challenge but it's a challenge I relish every time I mediate a case.  In some mediations and with some people, it's easier than with others.  Sometimes, it happens quickly, even on our initial mediation session.  Other times, I have to work throughout the day to build credibility with a party and to gain his or her trust.  Every mediation is different because every person is different.  No two mediations are like because no two people are alike.

Last night was the second time I had mediated for these individuals and their attorneys.  I mediated for them last fall but we were unable to get the case settled.  I was going to see then again in January but I got Covid-19, so mediation was postponed.  They rescheduled for another day of mediation, yesterday, in a last ditch effort to settle their case before a three day trial later this month.

It was a tough case to resolve but when it was over, the parties were relieved.  The attorneys were relieved, and appreciative, too.  Me?  I was satisfied that I helped two people, with two boys, resolve a very difficult divorce case without having to spend thousands and thousands of dollars attacking each other in a three day trial.  Hopefully, I helped them put an end to the emotional tumult, stress, and anxiety that goes hand-in-hand with contested divorce litigation.

It's Friday.  I've got to get through today, then plan on watching four baseball games tomorrow in two locations, Donelson (Joe) and Drakes Creek (JP).  And maybe, just maybe, find time to get a run or two in over the weekend.