The Captain

Friday night, after a long week at work, I went for a run while Jude took Joe to "the carnival" at MBA before the last home football game of the season (vs. Knoxville Catholic) for the undefeated Big Red.  I needed the run, for sure, and honestly, I was looking forward to a little quiet time at home that evening.

As I walked back into the house, I noticed that Joe's club soccer coach, Caleb, had texted me asking if Joe had time for a quick telephone call.  That's odd, I thought, but with the team scheduled to play in a tournament in Murfreesboro Saturday and Sunday, I called him to make sure everything was all right.  

I didn't know what to expect when I called Caleb.  What I got, however, was what will go down in the history of my life as one of my all-time favorite telephone calls.

After making small talk for a minute, Caleb got right to the point.  He told me that playing center back on defense, Joe had really become a vocal leader, positioning the defense and communicating with the forwards in front of him.  He also told me that at practice, he always knew he could pay less attention to Joe's side of a drill because he would encourage the players to run it correctly, pay attention, and complete the drill properly.  

Continuing, Caleb told me had talked to Thomas McDaniel (who is serving as assistant coach), as well as Gabe (who runs the organization), and told them he wanted Joe to serve as team captain for the tournament over the weekend and the foreseeable future.

Team Captain.

I paused for a moment to collect myself, a million thoughts running through my head, my heart about to explode from my chest in a burst of pride.  Smiling as I paced around the house, I told Caleb how much I appreciated his kind words about Joe and that Joe would be honored to serve as team captain.  I also told him that Joe should hear it directly from him - that it would mean more - so we coordinated a telephone call later that evening with Jude and Joe after the MBA football game.

He asked Joe to keep it quiet and Saturday morning, as the boys warmed up before their first game, he brought the team together, Caleb made the announcement to the entire squad.  As his teammates clapped for Joe, Caleb presented him with an armband emblazoned with a "C" - the captain's armband - well known in soccer circles and not unlike the "C" sewn on the chest of the captain of a hockey team.

That one letter - "C" - carries so much meaning to me, as a father who tries every day to teach his boys to be leaders.  Really, it's everything.

As I watched Joe and his teammates play soccer over the weekend - four games with two easy wins, a blowout loss, and a tough loss in the championship game against a bunch of boys from St. Henry's (including Keaton from the Braves' baseball team) - I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude and pride.  

Gratitude that God has blessed me with not one, but two, intelligent, competitive, kind hearted, athletic boys.  And pride that Joe is a natural leader in everything he does, in athletics, school, or socially.  That's just who he is and how he is wired.

I think a lot about leadership in general and, specifically, whether it can be taught to children.  Is leadership a character trait a child is born with or is can it be developed over time?  There's not an easy answer to that question but, in truth, it's probably a little of both.  Some boys are born leaders.  Leadership skills can be developed over time, I think, and boys can grow into leadership roles.  

Joe falls into the former category, as he is a born leader.  From day one, he has been someone his peers turned to as a tone setter as far back as Children's House.  There, the longtime director, Anne Colley, once told me that Joe mediated all of the disputes not the playground.  Sound familiar?

In school at USN, Jude and I have heard time and again from teachers - particularly last year when his third grade class had a few students who were a handful for the teacher to manage - that Joe did his work, behaved, and encouraged other kids to do the same.  Joe took ownership and in some sense felt responsible for how smoothly things went - or didn't go - in class each day.  

On the baseball field or on the basketball court, Joe always has been a leader.  Confident, outgoing, and in charge.  Playing shortstop or second base, he's the one telling the other players how many outs there are or where they need to go with the baseball if it's hit to them.  

This summer, when he played for the Braves' all-star team with boys he didn't know, he quickly established himself as a team leader.  Honestly, as the team leader.  His enthusiasm, versatility, competitiveness, and burning desire to win was apparent for everyone to see.  It was contagious and the other players gravitated to him.  Several parents I didn't know before he played for the Braves marveled to me how easily he fit in with his new teammates and how quickly he began leading them in practices and games.  

It's the same with basketball, really.  Joe often handles the ball and is an exceptional passer for his age.  He sees the court well and has the ability to find his teammates when they are open for easy baskets.  He communicates on defense and offense, reminding his teammates where they're supposed to be.  He's always been that way.

That's Joe.  Comfortable in his own skin.  Not particularly concerned about what others think.  Confident enough to lead in any situation in the classroom, socially, or playing sports.  Always smiling and happy.  The kind of kid other kids like to be around.  

It was a big moment for Joe when Coach Caleb presented him with the captain's sleeve on Saturday morning.  It was a big moment, too, for his old man to watch him play soccer wearing it.