Change is in the air, as Joe's last full week at Children's House draws to a close today. He'll have school Monday - Wednesday, next week, then Water Day on Thursday and just like that, our family's seven years there will be over.
It seems so sudden and so final. The end of a definitive era in our lives, for sure. In many ways, it will be the end of the innocence for Joe. He'll for from the nurturing, loving cocoon of Classroom B at Children's house - where he's been with Ms. Michelle and Ms. Tess for the past three years - to kindergarten at University School. A bigger school with hundreds of students in the lower school, not to mention the middle and upper schools.
So, this post is really about two things. Joe, of course, as he moves on to University School. And the end of our run at Children's House. I guess they're linked, but subject matter and time.
When Jude got the call from Children's House eight years ago advising that they had a spot open for J.P. but that it would be a five day a week program, we were paralyzed by indecision. We didn't know if we should keep J.P. at West End United Methodist Church or start him at Children's House, a Montessori school.
J.P started there, as a 3 year old, in the fall of 2011. I remember the day Jude and dropped him off there for the first time. As she brought her 2005 Honda Pilot to a stop in the pickup line and a "returning friend" helped J.P. step down onto the ground, his Children's House bag on his shoulder, I cried. Jude smiled and I cried. We sighed and drove home.
Jude and learned on the fly about playdates, positive discipline and "the Montessori way." J.P. made friends, of course, but tended to focus on one or two kids as his constant playmates, different ones each year. Brady and Jack (McDaniel) his first year, Victoria (White) his second year Aidan (Ozgener) his third year. Brady moved away after his first year, a brief friendship lost forever.
Jude and I made friends with a few of the parents at Children's House but I'm not sure we really connected with anyone in particular, not the way other parents seemed to connect with each other. We were busy - I guess everyone was - and a lot of the moms didn't work outside the home. Jude, of course, did so that make meeting up for coffee after drop-off a difficult proposition.
I don't recall how it happened, but I joined the Board of Directors, I think during J.P.'s second year. Almost immediately, I began to get to know several other parents. The next year I was elected board president and in an ironic twist, the year I served as board president was the one year in the last seven that we haven't had a child at Children's House. Looking back, it was a very impressive board of directors in terms of professional accomplishments and community involvement. Many became my good friends and remain so to this day.
One of the best parts, for me, of my involvement with the Board of Directors is that I got to know Anne Colley, the director of the school who retired at the end of the 2016-17 academic year after an amazing 26 year run at Children's House. She was the heart and soul of the school for almost three decades and knew everybody who was anybody in the early education/preschool/Montessori galaxy. Anne was equal parts administrator, educator, leader, role model and keeper of the "Montessori Way." Without questions, she is one of the most accomplished, impressive people I have ever known in a professional capacity.
We struggled mightily with whether to start J.P. at kindergarten at University School of Nashville in the fall of 2013 or to enroll him in "K Club" at Children's House. After much deliberation, we decided to postpone school for a year and give her a third year at Children's House. It was a great decision for him, in retrospect. He grew, became more independent and is a leader in his classes at University School to this day in large part because of the third year he spent there.
(Switching days and locations, it's Sunday morning and I'm having a latte at Portland Brew in 12South before I head to NHC Place to visit my mom.)
When we started Joe at Children's House as a three year old, there was much less trepidation. Intuitively, we knew Joe would be fine because, well, J.P. had been fine when he enrolled as a "new friend." We knew Joe would enjoy being in Classroom B with Ms. Michele because J.P. had done so well with her. Like J.P., in his first year at Children's House, Joe went from 8:20 a.m. - noon on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so he could still have a couple of half days each week with Uncle Carley, our longtime friend and nanny. That was important to us.
Joe grew and flourished at Children's House, just as J.P. had done. At the end of his second year, as a "returning friend," we again had a hard time deciding whether to start him in kindergarten at USN on time or enroll him in "K Club" at Children's House. Joe had, and has, some fine motor difficulties and we had been taking him to occupational therapy once a week, so we decided to continue that and give him another year at Children's House. Of course, after we had made the decision, I was talking to Anne Colley one day and she expressed a measure of surprise we were waiting to start him in kindergarten at USN because in her mind, she was ready. More confused than ever, we stuck with the plan and hopefully it will be the right one. Time will tell, I guess.
And, here we are, with three and a half more days at Children's House. The memories are many and varied, nearly all filled with love and learning.
First day drop-offs for J.P. and Joe.
Many, many mornings for me with J.P. and especially, Joe, as I normally took him to Children's House in the morning because the dropoff was later and Jude needed to get in to work earlier. Lots of mornings of "Joe Time," something I invented a couple of years ago to mark our morning time as special.
Fundraising, especially in the early years and when I was involved on the Board.
Six of seven "Grandparents' Days" and Monte Soire's. My mom, of course, has missed the last two or three "Grandparents' Days," and that makes me unspeakably sad.
Lots of great art courtesy of Ms. Antoinette, a special lady and art instructor who has been a mainstay at Children's House forever. I'm so glad she didn't retire when Anne Colley did.
A whole bunch of Board meetings. It was tough for me to get used to not having any board meetings to go to last year and this year.
The Positive Discipline class that Jude and I attended the first fall J.P. was at Children's House. Ms. Juanita (another longtime teacher) and Ms. Michele taught the class, which seems a lifetime ago.
Water Days. The last one is this Thursday, and I'll have to miss it.
Watching the children in Classroom B gravitate to Joe on Wednesday mornings when I brought him to school late, after we had been to see Ms. Lisa for occupational therapy. That's when I knew he was a little bit different from J.P. He liked being the center of attention and was a leader, which is exactly what Anne Colley told me she had observed on the playground.
Playing basketball with Joe on the small basketball court at the back entrance to the school, where I almost always entered to drop off J.P., then later, Joe. Both boys spent their third year almost entirely on that basketball court, playing basketball, or so it seems.
Three "Special Days" for J.P. and three for Joe. And they were special.
Many late night runs, after the boys were in bed, where I as part of my route, I ran up the driveway and said a silent prayer thanking God that our boys had a safe, nurturing place to begin their education.
Pausing, so many times, and occasionally snapping a photograph with my iPhone, of the playground as I walked to my truck after dropping J.P. or Joe off at school. A quiet minute of reflection before I began what often was a stressful work day.
The "Children's House song," sung by Ms. Kelly (long since gone from Children's House) on a compact disc that J.P. insisted we play over and over and over in Jude's car his first year there. I can still here it now, in my head.
"Sheldon's House," which was what Jonny Meade called Children's House, confused, when J.P. first started attending school there. It became a running joke.
Nap helpers, lunch time friends, the boys' "work" each day and Jude asking whose "Special Day" it was, then guessing at dinner.
So many friends for the boys and so many stories about what happened on the playground each day.
Good team, bad team. A game passed down from class to class over the years, like tag, that died a quick death when Ms. Michele forbade the kids from playing it anymore earlier this year.
Love, lots of love.
Children's House, in the end, represented a more innocent time for me, for our boys and for our family. When J.P. started there, my mom wasn't ravaged by Alzheimer's disease. There were no all-star teams in baseball and travel teams in soccer. We lived in our small house on Elliott Avenue. Things were simpler, not necessarily better but probably easier.
And, now, here we are, staring Joe's last week at Children's House. The words of my friend and fellow lawyer, Greg Smith (two of his boys when there many year ago), echo in my mind. Words I've repeated to others in many settings over the years, informal and formal.
"The only bad thing about Children's House is that your child has to leave."
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