What It Means to Be Kind

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about kindness and what it means to be kind.

Am I a kind person?  

What can I do to be kinder or, conversely, less unkind?

Kindness involves patience, I think.  That's an area, for me, that can use considerable work.  Often time, I find myself growing impatient during an interaction with someone I don't know very well, like a commercial transaction.

Maybe it's the Google Fiber representative on the telephone who can't tell me with any certainty why they can't activate my account or when they will be able to do so.

Maybe it's the hostess at Pancho & Lefty's who tells me I only can order Sunday brunch, and not lunch, even though it's almost 12:30 p.m.  Or, during the same visit, it's the waitress who is moving so very slow when the restaurant is uncrowded and takes forever to bring us water and take our order.

Maybe it's the wife of the owner of the dry cleaners I switched to who tries to tell me that my order wasn't supposed to be ready when I know good and well that it was.  

Maybe it's the barista in Honest Coffee Roasters - who, as it turns out, is working her first shift - to whom I show my obvious displeasure when she tells me she can't get me an actual coffee cup for my mid-morning latte, as opposed to a paper cup.  

Maybe it's the new manager of Bongo Java Belmont - with whom I've become acquainted and like very much - to whom I express my frustration at breakfast with the boys when he tells me that they're not serving food on plates but in styrofoam containers, even for those dining in, like us.

Truth be told, I felt badly enough a few of these interactions that I apologized - then or later - to make amends.  I took a dozen donuts from Five Daughters by the dry cleaners because I felt bad for acting like a jerk a few days earlier.

Those are person-to-person transactions in which I've been involved with people I don't really know over the past couple of months.  I know there have been numerous occasions in the recent past when I have been impatient, or overly demanding, with my family or co-workers, or attorneys against whom I have cases.

Impatient and demanding.  Those words deserve some thought and consideration, too.  They're similar, yet different.  I don't think I can treat them as meaning the same thing because there are distinct differences.  

Now, this isn't to say that I am always an insufferable asshole, because I'm not.  I'm capable of being that way as, I guess, almost all of us are depending on our mood and the circumstances in which we find ourselves.  

Most of the time, my interactions with others are pleasant and, dare I say, kind.  I'm normally very polite to strangers and acquaintances.  I'm quick with a joke or a smile, which is the people who work at the  places I frequent seem to enjoy seeing me. 

Also, I'm forever trying help someone with something - often a legal problem - or offering advice when asked.  This happened recently at Honest Coffee Roasters and Burger Up, where I sat down (or telephoned) someone who worked there to offer my advice on how to work through a problem. 

That's all fine, well, and good but what I think I want to do, to the extent I can, is to eliminate the unkind or  impatient personal interactions from my life, at home, at work, and commercially.  That's my goal, anyway, and something I want to work diligently toward.