Final Approach

It's late, I'm tired.  Worn out, really, but that's nothing compared to how Jude feels, I know.  Foolishly, I scheduled 9 mediations in 10 days leading up to taking a couple of weeks off of work, beginning Monday, to spend time with Jude, J.P. and our new son.  I worked past 8 p.m. Monday, to 5:30 p.m. Tuesday and to 6:15 p.m. tonight, mediating cases each day.  Fortunately, I was able to help the parties and their attorneys settled all 3 cases, but I'm spent.  Still, I've got to find the energy to mediate two more cases, tomorrow and Friday.

Again, poor planning by me to not allow myself some time to wind things down at work before our new son arrives.  Nothing to do now but fight through and make the best of it.

All I have to do, though, is look to Jude for inspiration.  She's my rock, my best friend, my partner and my hero.  She's the best person I know, bar none.  Her work ethic is unsurpassed, as evidenced by the fact she's working (at Mayor Dean's and Governor Haslam's offices, respectively) through Friday, as opposed to taking a few days off before our new son arrives.  I know she's worn out - physically and emotionally - yet she rarely ever complains.  She's beautiful.  8 + months pregnant and more beautiful every day, even though she doesn't feel that way.  My girl, my lovely wife.

I want this baby so much for her.  She's sacrificed so much to give me another son and to give J.P. a brother.  Every day - literally - I pray to God for her pregnancy to go well, for her to be healthy and for our son to be born without any complications or issues.  With all my heart, I just want her to be okay and for our son to be okay.  In my lifetime, I have never wanted anything so badly.  I haven't.

Jude's strength, resolve and determination - her very will - are something to behold.  I'm in awe of her.

Tonight, before she went to sleep, as we lay in bed together, I put my hand on her stomach.  Quietly, I talked to my son, told him I couldn't wait to meet him and also told him his big brother has so much to teach him.  I could feel him moving, almost in response to my voice.  I just want to hold him in my arms and know Jude is okay and that he is okay.  It's not a lot, but it's everything.  I'm asking for a small thing,  but I'm asking for a miracle.